tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32570460.post1078768538601718547..comments2024-03-13T07:34:24.149+00:00Comments on The Age of Uncertainty: I'm chavin' it...Steerforthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07627936539372313828noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32570460.post-25252413293272298082008-02-21T22:12:00.000+00:002008-02-21T22:12:00.000+00:00She was barely sentient. I think she'd been eating...She was barely sentient. I think she'd been eating the food.Steerforthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07627936539372313828noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32570460.post-62512072565001006642008-02-19T20:35:00.000+00:002008-02-19T20:35:00.000+00:00Heh. I'm picturing Catherine Tate's Lauren as the ...Heh. I'm picturing Catherine Tate's Lauren as the girl behind the counter. Was she bovvered?Leebothttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15772451866981084734noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32570460.post-18114951526002181602008-02-10T18:33:00.000+00:002008-02-10T18:33:00.000+00:00That's exactly what happened. Once Fagash Lil had ...That's exactly what happened. Once Fagash Lil had delivered my burger she said 'Ang on love, ah juss ge'i awl clean f'yer' and produced a bottle of carcinogenic fluids. <BR/><BR/>I'd rather have taken my chances with the dirt.Steerforthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07627936539372313828noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32570460.post-33320021426719771312008-02-10T14:17:00.000+00:002008-02-10T14:17:00.000+00:00Table wetting, a minor art in the great British t...Table wetting, a minor art in the great British tradition of Customer Repelling. Waiting till a customer has just sat down at a table (which has been unoccupied for hours) before rushing over and squirting pungent cleaning chemicals at it and rearranging the ensuing slime with a dampish cloth. Ritual dictates the customer then has to wait for an unspecified time to allow the table to become dry enough to return all the newspapers, mobile phones etc he has lifted to allow the table wetting to take place in the first place.<BR/><BR/>True masters of the art of table wetting lurk, waiting for you to take the first bite of your food, before punging up the table next to you and neutralising, at a single squeeze of a hand-held spray gun, all taste buds within a six foot radius.<BR/><BR/>They teach this stuff in Catering college.Junk Monkeyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14815834128251943035noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32570460.post-72774661999637127822008-02-10T09:11:00.000+00:002008-02-10T09:11:00.000+00:00Ah yes, the mop - I'd forgotten about that!I think...Ah yes, the mop - I'd forgotten about that!<BR/><BR/>I think the people who wanted healthy options meant elsewhere, not at McDonald's. I can't say any of their lighter options looked remotely enticing.Steerforthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07627936539372313828noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32570460.post-85203642057034051142008-02-09T22:14:00.000+00:002008-02-09T22:14:00.000+00:00Excellent stuff! McDonald's did do the health thi...Excellent stuff! McDonald's did do the health thing a couple of years ago but I thought they had removed them all again, and recall an interview with one of their (or equivalent fast food burger chain) executives, who said, "People told us they wanted healthy options. It turns out they lied."<BR/><BR/>Which is fair enough. If you fancy a salad and smoothie, you sure as hell don't go to McD's.<BR/><BR/>By the way, you missed the other essential element of the McDonald's experience: an ill-motivated immigrant worker repeatedly swiping a mop against your feet as you try to eat.John Selfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05761816149593541133noreply@blogger.com